Escaping from a web of lies

Have you ever observed how spiders build a web? At first, you won’t notice a thing, but gradually it becomes clear and more significant depending on how laborious the spider is. I liken that to lies; one lie can end up becoming a web of lies. No wonder some individuals end up being pathological liars.

In a bid to protect our images or portray a particular image to society, we tend to lie such that lies become an integral part of our lives hence the saying, “A lie told once remains a lie, but a lie told a thousand times; becomes the truth.” As much as lies can be told to build or yield a positive outcome, it is imperative to note their grip on our lives. Not being careful of the frequency of your lies can result in a web of lies. In that web, you might end up entangled, and the effects are not pleasing.

There are many reasons why people find themselves caught up in a web of lies. Some lie to fit in. Society makes it hard for people to fit in without perusing a particular handbook of societal standards. People end up putting on a facade just to be accepted. It is the nature of human beings to have a sense of belonging in any place they find themselves in. Some act or come up with ways that can alter the perceptions of surrounding people. They break certain norms, whereas some lie or even fake their lifestyles and society accepts them. In both cases, there is an acceptance—the difference in the route taken.

The majority of relationships are the center of a web of lies. These range from blood relations, romantic relationships, business relationships, friendships and et cetera. Being secretive can breed lies. It’s not surprising to hear of people who lie to their partners so that they won’t find out about their deepest secrets, such as cheating. Again, some people lie to protect their loved ones. They do so with love. It’s pretty debatable whether one should lie to protect their loved ones or not. A penny for your thoughts, dear reader.

As I commit pen to paper, it is with the deepest sorrow that I can attest that some mothers lie to their children to protect them. They choose not to say what is happening behind the scenes to maintain peace in families. They suffer in silence. In some instances, one lie ends up manifesting into a thousand lies. Some never make it out of the web; some do. There are cases of abuse that are swept under the rug. Each time, the victims have to fabricate lies to avoid shame or out of fear or love. Sad.

How then can one break free from those chains? Such is a question that came to my mind as I was penning this article. Breaking the entanglements of lies requires enough zeal and determination. It all emanates from genuine willingness. Let’s look at this whole web of lies from another angle. How about you start building a web of truths? When you become honest and start telling the truth, you will begin to embrace who you are. You begin fighting and avoiding specific battles. By being truthful, you are building a foundation of integrity that will enable others to trust you. You become honourable because one who is honourable is trustworthy.

Getting rid of old habits is a process. It’s like destroying a dilapidated building and starting over again right from the foundation. A moment of introspection; how is your life? Is it built on lies? If yes, then I would advise you to start that renovation process. Break those bricks of lies, cut off those entanglements that are fueling that desire to lie! If there is a need for you to change the environment, please do. A life without any pretence is full of joy. Don’t put pressure on yourself. You might backslide but always remember, Rome was not built in one day!

Take this with you; You might play a game of hide and seek, but your lies will always catch up with you. Lies can result in debt, low self-esteem, and sicknesses and so on. Do you want the truth to dwell in you or to have falsehoods living rent-free in your life and being troublesome tenants? Of course, the truth hurts, but it’s much better than being stuck in a web of lies. Let’s normalise being honest at all times.